A specific type of heartache results from saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and having someone take you at your word, rather than from falling out of love. That appears to be the essence of what transpired between Bunnie Xo and Jelly Roll. And if you’ve been following their story for a while, you’ll find that it falls somewhere between incredibly depressing and excruciatingly human.
Jason DeFord, popularly known as Jelly Roll, filed for divorce on May 18, citing “irreconcilable differences” as the formal cause, according to a TMZ report earlier this year. May 9 was listed as the separation date. This was the kind of news that stopped millions of fans from scrolling.
One of the most well-known names in country music at the moment is Jelly Roll. The rapper-turned-country singer from Nashville has three Grammy awards under his belt, over 20 million monthly Spotify listeners, and a backstory that, if it weren’t completely true, would feel too dramatic. Before reaching his thirties, he was incarcerated numerous times before making a fresh start, discovering music, faith, and Bunnie. His acceptance speech at the Grammy Awards for Best Contemporary Country Album this year was the kind of thing that people record and save. He said to Bunnie, “I would have never changed my life without you,” as he was on stage. “I would have ended up dead or in jail.”
Bunnie Xo, whose real name is Alisa DeFord, was a former sex worker who left the business in 2023. She used her podcast, Dumb Blonde, to establish her own platform and make it truly popular. She is astute, unvarnished, and has always been herself without apology. She claimed in her February memoir that the first time she shook Jelly Roll’s hand, “every star in the sky collided.” It’s the type of line that either sounds like fiction or fully resonates. It struck a chord with many people.
Relationships, however, are rarely as tidy as memoir writing. In her book, Bunnie also revealed that Jelly Roll had an affair for ten months prior to their marriage. In 2018, the couple had a brief separation. Before deciding to stay, she wrote that she had nearly reached her breaking point. In 2023, they renewed their vows in Las Vegas. The fact that the Vegas renewal was only two years ago is what makes the current divorce seem particularly sudden.
Bunnie described what really transpired in a June episode of Dumb Blonde. The two got into a fight on Mother’s Day. According to reports, the tension between them had been gradually increasing for nearly a year, characterized by a decrease in communication and an increase in distance. Bunnie told him to file for divorce, which she refers to as the “cardinal rule” of their relationship, in a moment of weariness and annoyance. It was uttered with rage. She didn’t intend for it to land that way. “Was I caught off guard? Was there reciprocity in this divorce? On the podcast, she stated, “No, it was not mutual.”
After packing a bag and leaving the house, she didn’t talk to him for roughly a week. He had already filed by the time they got back in touch. After that, Bunnie shed fifteen pounds. She began hormone replacement therapy and counseling. According to her own account, she was attempting to maintain her composure while witnessing the conclusion of something she didn’t want to happen.
Whether the two will eventually make amends is still up in the air. According to Bunnie, their relationship wasn’t irreparably damaged, but rather stuck, and she thought they should have a chance at therapy. She seemed unwilling to abandon something she had spent years defending and reconstructing. It’s less clear if Jelly Roll feels the same way.
Observing this from the outside, it’s evident that the couple didn’t stop loving one another. It appears more like two people ran out of appropriate words at precisely the wrong moment, and one of them took the incorrect ones seriously.
